His father, Donald Edwin King, was a merchant seaman. Donald was born under the surname Pollock, but as an adult, used the surname King.
The topic of character thoughts has come up repeatedly for me in the last couple of weeks, and I promised to address punctuation for inner dialogue. Inner dialogue is simply the speech of a character to himself. To do so would make them vulnerable, naked, without protection. With characters, however, we get to listen in.
Inner dialogue and thought reveal truth. They reveal hope or dreams or resignation. They reveal emotions or beliefs too painful to be shared with other characters. They reveal the heart. They reveal despair of the soul. They reveal strength of the spirit.
When we see a mother comforting her child, telling him all is well, and then we see into her thoughts, knowing that in truth she has no hope that all will be well, we feel her love for her child.
We see her own feelings and the need she feels to protect her child from a painful truth. What else can thought and inner dialogue do? First, the character must be the viewpoint character for a scene. You could show random thoughts a time or two to establish the way a character thinks, but skip those kinds of thoughts for the most part.
Give the reader thoughts that reveal the character and have bearing on the plot. Thoughts that up the emotional temperature for the reader. In practical terms, try any of the following. It may not be perfect for every story, genre, and set of circumstances, but it will work for many.
Especially for stories with deep POV, that very intimate third-person point of view.
The use of italics for thoughts, however, can create a greater narrative distance, setting readers outside of the character and the events of the scene. Such a choice may be necessary if an omniscient narrator treats readers to thoughts from a variety of characters in the same scene.
Yet a thought tag alone, with no italics, may also meet your needs. Pairing the thoughts with thought tags thought, wondered, imagined is helpful to identify the owner of a particular thought.
Montrose angled his head, taking in both Giselle and her sister behind her. They look nothing alike, he thought. He should have known Giselle was not Ariana.
No need to write he thought to himself. In such cases, you might indeed need to tell us who Montrose is thinking to. Note that the verb look is in the present tense.
Because this is inner dialogue—words directed to the character from himself—verb tense can be past or present, even if the rest of the narrative is past tense.
Readers will understand that the viewpoint character is the one revealing his thoughts. They look nothing alike. He dismissed the two of them with the flick of a wrist. And neither looks like my Margaret.
Use of italics allows the writer to treat thoughts as if the words are dialogue, as if the character is speaking to himself.Freewriting: A Means of Teaching The "academic" writing that one is taught in high school often discourages the use of the personal or emotional to get a point across.
What every reader must realize is that there is a bit of "personal and emotional" influence in every written work. Exercises such as looping and unpacking code words on.
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